I have undergone the yearly job review ceremony, also known as a foregone conclusion. The vast majority of the review is the store’s total results, so everyone basically starts out with a failure. It’s not even worth getting upset about it. I might as well stick my tongue out at my boss's back, as I … Continue reading I used to make 6.6% above minimum wage, now I make 1.5%.
Author: Hetty Eliot
Sometimes a cigar isn't just a cigar. Sometimes it's a whole box of cigars. Check out my blog https://whothehellknows.home.blog/
Happy Easter
John 11:25: "Jesus said unto Martha, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live." Revelation 1:17-18: "Don’t be afraid! I am the First and Last. I am the living one. I died, but look–I am alive forever and ever!" God love y'all
Someone explain toothbrush replacement theory to me because I don’t understand economics.
I've noticed that on the back of toothbrush packages, it usually says that dentists recommend replacing your toothbrush every three months. I find that nasty. That's only four new toothbrushes a year. I feel like here's where sensible economic greed should enter the picture. Considering the nastiness of not replacing it at least once a … Continue reading Someone explain toothbrush replacement theory to me because I don’t understand economics.
I forgot what I was gonna call this but I think it was whatever.
Uh oh, I'm on time for work--what did I forget?--Did I brush my teeth? Check. Pants? Check. Well, then I guess I'm good to go. You silly--I was only pretending I forgot how to hold a knife and fork for a second. I need an excuse. I grasp for anything near at hand--yes, there's a … Continue reading I forgot what I was gonna call this but I think it was whatever.
If I never hear the words “social distancing” again…..
.....I will be just fine. UPDATE: March 24, 2021: Happy One Year Anniversary I originally published this on March 24, 2020. No end of those two words in sight. I'm not exactly fine right now because I literally have covid as we speak. Oh well. But as true today as it was a year ago, … Continue reading If I never hear the words “social distancing” again…..
10% off if you strip in public and blame the store.
Sometimes when I’m getting ready for work, I delay going to the bathroom until I get there so I can do it on the clock and waste a couple of minutes before I go to the office. The other morning, I headed to the bathroom, whistling and thinking about ways to avoid my boss and … Continue reading 10% off if you strip in public and blame the store.
Is YOUR blog a magnificent beat?
I don't care what anyone says, spam is the best. "Magnificent beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your web site, how can i subscribe for a weblog web site? The account aided me a applicable deal.I have been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered shiny clear idea" Ha! Later I … Continue reading Is YOUR blog a magnificent beat?
In which I talk to myself about what’s wrong with me. (part 1 of 1,000,000)
I thought I’d write a writer’s block post like everyone else does when they have writer’s block. Why do I have a block? Because of the imaginary little man in my head who criticizes and humiliates me. Based on a true, pathetic story, a real TL;DR. If I ever get to meet God, the first … Continue reading In which I talk to myself about what’s wrong with me. (part 1 of 1,000,000)
Blue, Yellow, and Black – Song Lyric Sunday prompt
The prompt caught my eye on Fandango's blog. Original prompt can be found at Jim Adam's Song Lyric Sunday. The word is "colors." When I saw the writing prompt word, a couple of songs popped into my head, "Blue and Yellow" (2002) by The Used and "Black is Black" (1966) by Los Bravos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5W_lQewmIwI I … Continue reading Blue, Yellow, and Black – Song Lyric Sunday prompt
A Cut and Color.
A story.. “Put it on,” she said, with one wave of her cigarette. I obediently put it on. The necklace had an oval turquoise stone set into a silver fleur-de-lis. She was taking a deep drag as I did so. She exhaled. “Yes, that looks very nice with your new hair.” I remember the first … Continue reading A Cut and Color.
Histrionics (writing prompt.)
You call me a bitch, Say I'm hysterical, Look like a witch, Being heretical. Stomp like a child, Screech, make no sense. Look at that girl--pretty, mild-- I'm wrapped too tight, way too tense. But I think it's pretty ironic, You're flailing your arms, Shrieking I'M histrionic. I discovered this prompt on the blog The … Continue reading Histrionics (writing prompt.)
Uhh don’t follow the money.
At the store, we recently had a theft of nearly two thousand dollars from a drawer in which money is kept to distribute for change. My job is to prepare the money that goes into that drawer every day and count what’s left of it the next morning. Anyway, no one will say what happened. … Continue reading Uhh don’t follow the money.
I have no friends at work.
Lately I think I have the loneliest job in the entire store. Everyone else has at least one peer, whereas I am the only one in my job function. My title is “Administrative Colleague.” I used to be part of the “Administrative Support Team,” but the team dwindled down from five employees to one. No … Continue reading I have no friends at work.
Two weeks in…something’s missing?
Just some low-key whining.. no energy for heavy stuff. I woke up this morning, soaked in sweat, and I knew something was missing, but I still don’t know what. I don’t even know if what’s missing is a good thing or a bad thing. What I suspect, though, is a missing link, a link that … Continue reading Two weeks in…something’s missing?
Happy New Year and a fond farewell to 2020.
I figured that since I only managed one post this month, I ought to at least try to squeeze one out at the last minute so I can say I wrote two. I started this blog last January to begin something new in my life at a time when I was completely hopeless. I dug … Continue reading Happy New Year and a fond farewell to 2020.
